Saturday, November 22, 2014

14 things I've learned in 2014

1. Boys are fishy. And women take the blame for feeding them the news but they really are the most curious of all species, I must say because after we shared something personal or should I say a “secret” that they can’t keep to their best bud they will tell it all anyway saying “I just heard this through someone” but hell yeah! I’m the closest girl-friend they know so who else right? In short, they go straight to the person involved or somewhat close enough then it will all go back to the speculative girl who just happened to be in the moment to share. You didn’t mean to blow off their friendship or relationship! You just happened to know and tell it to the wrong person and there goes my used feelings everyone.

2. Love isn’t love if you’ll be thinking about it. Okay. There were men in my life this year that made some knocking into my heart and I thought for once one of them can actually be the one. But things do happen for a reason, my heart isn’t at peace at all though I know it was moved several times. 

3. Ask and you’ll be asked. I think I have to learn this still; I was almost in love that I didn’t bother asking. I stick with my fantasy of falling in love with no words required to express it and thought it will be enough. It ran for months thinking we’re both in the same page but seriously, nothing’s really for sure unless you ask straight to the point. So there goes my regret, not that I’m still drawn to the guy I’ve been talking about the whole year but I think this becomes a personal struggle because I wasn’t that assured with myself if I can really risk on love. Oh gawddd! 

4. Don't over share. Again, I’m just being me and when I say “me”, I mean being too comfortable. When I am in the moment of anything good and bad someone can just wait for my childhood stories, little secrets and business affairs be told! I don’t find it wrong at that very moment but when the people who have heard of them will use it to my offense then there I start regretting being very detailed with my life. That sometimes I do get the feeling that I’m not being taken seriously because of this habit of sharing. Though I have battled this habit and just give them headlines still I feel like I’m over sharing and that it’s making me think that I’m surrounded with people who never really cared. Sorry for the blame though. I’m just freeing my horizons in this short story of mine. Hihi 

5. Natural order of things. Just like how sperms meet at one try that it becomes the one writing now; how eggs gone through metamorphosis so we can adore the beautiful butterflies and how we can drink the waters from the clouds that has come from all bodies of water!? Seriously, I know all these things way back in elementary but it just came to me now that no matter how short we describe life is it will still require time for things to make sense. Like how my trade s*cks right now. It is almost a year since I started and to be precise I do it every day so why am I still lacking in skills? Why winning these days is too hard to reach? Why am I having doubts ever since I had my big loss? These questions rises for a reason that I’m worried and solutions couldn’t get through because of fear of losing out. So it made me go back to my reasons of what made me started trading so I can understand the whys. I’m lacking skills because I still have a lot to learn; wins are hard to reach because it was never really easy or else everyone you meet will be on it too and reason why I’m getting scared is because I want to see myself successful some time. Because much of life involves waiting and many wrong decisions are made because of impatience.

6. Beer is nice. I have to take back the words I’ve said before to my friends back in college when I refused to drink at one or more times because then I don’t feel the pleasure of drinking. Yes you heard me say feel because it’s not that bland (too much ice) or strong (no more ice! Augh!) after taste you “savour” but it’s that company along with every glass you take. Catching up is now made comforting when a bottle of mucho is shared among friends and colleagues. So this year, I think I have to thank my colleagues for making me see the good in the bad in this case.

7. There's beauty in moving on. I started to see its beauty because I have failed in love, in business and matters that draw me to cry, gone mad like a bitch and desperate at some points. But looking through the memories in my mind, I’ve also seen myself happy before they fail me since I laugh and cry and thought it over now I realized it’s not yet over and I am still bound to commit mistakes down the line that’s for sure. But the good news is I’ll keep standing though dizzy because I am a big fan of adventures and all these too shall pass. Now, I think I just have to search that path where no one knows where but for sure it will be my road to happiness! I am just again excited!

8. I'm beautiful. At least I dared to believe that I am. Hahahaha! There’s this line I’ve heard from a contestant while watching The Voice of the Philippines 2 when she was asked how she is feeling, “They say you have to believe in your talent because it is God’s given gift so no matter what I have to be confident.” In this case, I’m talking about that beauty you see at first look. I for one is guilty in judging someone by just looking but that don’t really sum up the character of a person because what it describes is how shallow my personality is for believing with what I just saw. I think this will not be too hard to absorb because I’ve seen some falling for this too that it’s not all about the looks that people really are looking for in a partner because truth is, what will make you stay until the end will be what’s skin deep, the mystery that kept you surprised over and over again. And so it made me thought of the reason why he left me just like that in mid-air when I know I’m for keeps, I’m not the typical but I am special. Those were my sentiments but now I know why it didn’t came to serious commitment because he failed to see that beauty or that he must have his own definition of beauty. And though I am confident with that beauty I have that is yet to be discovered by someone I’ll call Hon I just now want to let someone from the past know that it’s ok, I’m still beautiful I know because I made you look at me several times…   

9. I can conquer the world with the mind I have. I seriously have a fond for dreams, big dreams. I am that girl who is easily touched with stories of hope and passion. I just have no words to describe people who are sincerely following their biggest fears which happened to be their biggest dreams as well. And because I am also just like the one of the people who is chasing happiness I am all ready to accept whatever it will take to contain that feeling of pride and accomplishment. I just wish everyone in this world could have that passion for something they love to do so as one we can all hope for each other’s’ better days even if the roads may seem so weary to get them. Because it will be one perfect world if we can all wish each other with sincere intentions. So I compiled the clips that got me into sobbing this year! The people or living things that made an impact to get me off my feet and start surrounding myself with the things that would near me to my goal which is happiness. I think it will be so soon for every one of us because we already dared to believe that coming! Right!??!?!

10. Getting into business is not an easy task. There’s no perfect path all the way up so pressure comes off when I get into business myself six months ago and it turned out very promising to the point that I’m too broke to be spending these coming holidays with a holiday face. I have to loan and I need to sacrifice my spending such as supposed gift plans to uncles and aunties this Christmas; paying off my debt on my mobile plan; travelling solo in somewhere I can’t discuss yet all because I have to cover for the losses I made. But what is this mess without some lesson to teach me right? So I was able to be more prayerful; my words and statements being released are more meant because I don’t wish to hurt especially that I work with friends in this business I’m talking about. I fear less because I’ve come to know that I am already at risk and that fear will be no help so I always try to be composed when taking my turn. I came to know who my real friends are and that I don’t want to elaborate for now. Also I now know how to close a deal and really be holding responsible for it. It’s just that now it didn’t happen the way all three of us have imagined our first business venture would be like and it just made me earnest to be trying again because I have been welcomed so well that I want to make a comeback in business with a plan, more foundation of guts and knowledge and a mind set to surprise no other than myself next year! YEAH!!!

11. I'm an IRON MAN but not the hero type. This came to mind after watching Avengers and in there Captain America said this line to Iron Man, “You always find a way out.” And after hearing those words it felt like the Captain just talked to me, I mean ridiculed me! Remember my fandom over Iron Man? Yeah you most probably don’t. I’m a Marvel fan and I love Iron Man the most and this may be the reason why I find him appealing next to Loki, well who doesn’t! I think the connection is there because I always find him cool because he wears the coolest suit ever! And remember he has that biggest role in that movie! He redirects the missile to the tunnel where Loki’s army came from and viola! The movie ended and he just made the whole team realized why he always find his way out at every given situation and it’s not just to save himself but because that would mean he can still help and you don’t want to see your hope falling right?! So did I just made a point? HAHAHA What a joy to be able to share you that! HAHAHAHA

Anyway, going back to the real talk we’re having… just like Tony Stark I too always find myself to somewhere safe. Like if I have a chance where I always see opportunity to get away, I fly if I have to just to be free from stress and what I think hurts. Maybe that’s why I’ve been living independently for 3 years now, away from family drama and peer pressure of getting married or having a boyfriend real soon. But something you might actually don’t have an idea about that just like the man I adore I also care for the common good; I also wish for what you’re wishing for it’s just that I want to make it my way so if things fail I won’t be that someone who’ll feel betrayed in the end because I’ve been led on; I want to experience what you’ve been talking about so that I can fully understand the feeling of success or that failure we are all afraid of. I think I’ll be too afraid of seeing myself helpless so I’m equipping myself with hard earned experiences. And just like him, I want to be responsible for the many and to be able to do just that I have to be wealthy and to be a good role. I wish to be a promising person on this land too though you may think I’m not afraid at all like risking my whole wealth or life in general for the experience, I want to hold responsible for my own self.

12. When there’s pain, there’s shame. This I just felt recently, I’ve involved myself to some serious problem. The stress took me months then just a week ago I was able to take a deep breath for telling it to my family. It was not at all relief because the most stressful part indeed is facing it like an adult, compromising and it doesn’t suit me at all. I mean, the pain can leave you just right there in then but the shame would be so hard to brush off because I’ve caused some discomfort, inconvenience in a relationship that should not be tainted at all especially with money issues. Now, I am still battling with myself if I would have my genuine smile to face my family after that because more than the shame I also felt sorry for myself after the unexpected things happened. I may be stressing myself right now for thinking of not coming home this holiday but this must be one of my most serious problems ever experienced that I would dare not to see them just to free myself from thinking and I don’t know if I’ll have that peace around the people I’ve caused pain. I am not at all being myself for the white lies but that’s to protect something more important, relationships are. Hooooo I still don’t know where to go this Christmas because of this situation.  

13. Travel far. Since late last year I have been to places that brought me so many memories but I never really travelled far I must say because I was never that accustomed or left the place with experience that would take me forever to forget. Sorry to HK, Bangkok, SG and Malaysia because I just forgot the days I had on these amazing places when I stepped into my nampyeon’s country, South Korea. I mean that was Korea, everyone! The place where my biggest crushes like KIM HYUN JOONG, LEE MIN HO, Big Bang, 2PM, Song Jae Rim and all the cuties live! So what to do??!! I can’t manage not to be that amazed! I feel like I was in some drama episode shooting my “almost lost” scene at a subway; my most awaited cosmetic shop hopping in Myeondeong; the tongue out experience going up the stairs to see the famous dating site among dramas, Namsan Tower; the coffee shop hunting to K-Story (Hee-nim’s café); the everything yummy, spicy and expensive street foods in Insadong; the leaves falling and the pine trees breeze of autumn in Nami Island; my madness over thrift shopping in Ehwa University which is just a few steps from our cozy hostel; our first stop to Everland where I met Gwang Soo oppa at the zoo and the hologram concert experience of BIG BANG and 2NE1 are really just daebak!; the places where my favourite dramas were shot like the famous palaces and all those Koreans who I feel like family in a far place because they just helped us out whenever we’re doubting our route, It is crazy I know because I’ve been there and not just in any kind of day, it was there Chuseok or Thanksgiving day so it was extra special seeing Seoul!!! So for sure I’ll be back with more money in my pocket and a credit card that would be very good use! So with my coat on I'll see you soon Korea! Jeju and Nami Island too! 

14. Lifted High. Since June if not full 100%, I think at least 98% I am sure I’m in Him already. The remaining 2% is just when I doubt that I’ll be late for the talk. It started off when my good friend, Dean invited me to come with him and meet Bro. Bo of The Feast PICC and since then I know for sure I’ll grow. I was already into forex that time and thought this is the perfect time to finally attend. A part of the reason for coming is because I was seeking His guidance that time and just my luck, the talk was about my worries then it just gets through me each series. After that I’ve been inviting friends to come and though at most times I don’t have companion going to “the happiest place on Earth” still I never felt alone. No holds barred in singing and dancing. The joy of meeting Him on Sundays is overflowing that no matter how far or how bad the weather is I can now count on myself and still be there. He called for my name so I must follow and I believe I am again going to meet Him today because it’s Sunday. I don’t have sleep yet since 10pm but I know later I’ll rejoice for His name and again lifted high! 

Saturday, November 8, 2014

#TheNurseRapper

@fatimapalma after watching your video rapping for your patient, it made me think of my own profession. I work for an offshore bank and now thinking of moving to another to earn for more. Before knowing your story, I've been thinking that I'm being underpaid considering how other companies can offer for my role. Also with my diverse course I took in college, I can just shift from one field to another. And after knowing the sacrifices you make to getting your job it made me realize how difficult it must be to take that others are getting paid for jobs that can be learned or practiced without the need for licence. And when I feel like demotivated, I can just text my boss and say I'll take my leave even if it's on the day or fake it as if I got a bad cold which I doubt if nurses also make that excuse considering your nosy head nurse planning your shifting schedules. And whenever I feel like lazing around, I just tell myself that this isn't my money at stake so I can less care with near deadlines requests but with your work, you don't have the choice but to give them their meds on time, to make time when you're already multi tasking yourself; to be responsible for so many people's lives in the ward. In short, there's no room for mistakes or else we know what might happen. 

Now, I came to a realization that whatever your profession is you should be making sure you're doing it the right way because someone might feel overworked or underpaid with what you're behaving at work. I have a close friend who is also a nurse at a local hospital and I always rant on him about my work but he never really rants about his actually. We go to same church and I appreciate how he makes time to praise with his ever changing off.

I salute you Fatima; my good friends, Dean and Sheela; my Aunt Joy in Saudi and Aunt Minnie in London and many other nurses working passionately for their vocation! I am in awe of people who knows how to give value to their bread and butter that I might be looking for a rewarding sideline now because of this eye opening story! Our government might also want to change these nurses perspectives of working abroad because of salary issues so they may prefer working here instead and that no more big sacrifices be at made just by following the field they chose. But as much as we want you staying here we can't judge of those who left because we know aside from your proffession you take oath on you also have your own families to feed, to raise and to live. We also wants best for you and we do appreciate your help. To God be the glory! 

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Before "I do"

I've been thinking lately about my ultimate dream and the reasons why it seems so unreachable. 

And so I'm letting my brain bleed just for once, trying to be vulnerable, dropping off my guards all to think of the reasons why 3 years ago I started blogging. I need some convincing advise, something I'm clueless about or something hard for me to accept... My difficulties, my issues why I always find myself moving on and on. 

Disclaimer: This is an inspired tell all post after watching Korean drama, #ItsOkayThatsLove.

1. You're nice, cool, witty and smart but not just that beautiful. You know how annoying this feels to admit since I know for a fact that I have flaws like everybody else so can we just work on what's presently GOOD! 

(While changing the topic, Michelle Phan suddenly popped out of the window!)

You better stop there mah sister before you regard yourself the pitiful lead in your own drama! You know what? You've said some good traits you have and I know they were not your inborn talents or traits, personality in the first place does not come through genes, transplant, copy paste or any science. You know what I mean. Define your big eyes, paint those full lips, cover the blemishes and keep your double chins up. And you'll see a satisfied smile that you took time in improving yourself. Remember how you got your banking job last year? It will be as fullfilling if you try something you've never tried before. 

2. I'm too comfortable being myself, alone. I know this sounds just right but when I say, comfortable it means I have the tendency to isolate myself whenever I just feel like it. This started when I discovered that as long as I do just right (according to my own standards) then I can leave things unecessary behind. 

(Then Alex Gonzaga made her entrance while dancing to Beyonce moves~) 

Hmmmn... You know you're cruel! You should be sharing that comforts you find entertaining alone with your potential husband! Way to go dear if you'll just be hanging around  on your bed while talking to yourself or watching the latest episode of your now favorite korean drama! Grow up! You've been doing that for nearly 10 years!!! You better act now or waste another day or another decade doing that same old things you enjoy since you were thirteen! You know it's getting serious that you see it as an escape to your stress at work, to your unfinished businesses and your for real business. It's time you shift an old habit to productive ones, where you can also be feeling the same comforts when you're hanging out by yourself. Like go enroll to a gym! You're not the type who will flirt with hunk men but at least there you will be exposed as you get fit and improve your still hesitant self! Just maybe some man from the gym is also keeping up with his new found habit, exercise on a leisure hours. Find time sharing yourself to the world! 

3. Siiiiiiighs! He's making that same entrance again into my vulnerable heart. He's making a comeback into my work station and so in my fantasies when I'm at the state of forgetting him as someone who once made me feel special. I wish and I pray that he is the one and that this is just some part of our story, making up for the reasons why soon this relationship will be unbreakable and will lead to that "I do~" But because I tend to panic at the idea of dating, trust issues... I'm once again afraid to try. 

(Wooohhh Did just Jang Jae Yeol oppa told me this piece of advise?!!!)


Arraseo-yo oppa! I'll practice to be free at heart! 

4. Believe that you will! Now, trying to gain the courage to move on. Not because it was a painful experience but because I was left behind with regrets by not fully giving in to what my heart then feels. I want to bring back myself with the learned lessons of the past for I sincerely love to love. Though needless to say all episodes now of every drama I watch, it made me think of him. It feels unfair to be left behind but that's for sure, part of the big plan.

(I'm more convinced with this heads up!)


5. Once and for all, feel it. I never once deeply sympathized with other's pain, I did say it must have been hard but it was all just plain words. Since I thought of others problems like how I deal with mine like, "you are strong and free you will soon overcome this" but thinking now that I'm also struggling understanding my own circumstance, I have ignored others situation and I simply think, "it's your own problem", "you have to deal with it on your own" and forgot the very essence of why they are sharing something personal. 

6. By using my defenses, I sabotage my own happiness. I doubt a lot and regard a person who has the potential feelings as someone who will take advantage of me or will soon find me replaceable. :((( Because of this, I stop myself from being too kilig over the gestures of a potential boyfie because of my own random thoughts! Like I don't know already if I'm assuming or I'm too control freak?!? Is there some thin line I'm not aware of between the two???? 

(And so Jo Dong Min ajussi came to nag me...)

"What is the thing you want to protect? The anxiety disorder that you want to get rid of forever?" 

I think I have serious case of selfishness out of hardly finding love. I know I have my family and friends but if we'll break it down, my mom has my dad; my sister has my brother-in-law; my bestfriends who are always behind me stays to be the same and soon will find company too... Oooohhh this is light bulb! I focus too much on myself because I'm afraid to be left out again! And that I don't know yet what love can do and because I don't know I think tooooooooo muuuuuuuuuch!!! Gotchhhaaaa!!! I am my own problem!

7. I'm sporting the positivity but everytime chance comes by, I back off. It's hard to see that someone might actually be the right one~ That's why I want to be understood by none other than myself before saying I'm in but I think understanding oneself is an overrated term so the very least I can do is most probably just accept the person that I was, I am and I will be!!! Strength pa!!! 

And so the next thing I want to do is fall in love for the rest of my life! I want a beautiful love story like Jang Jae Yeol ❤️ Ji Hae Soo. A mature love! They are two individuals who have passed the common cause of break up, third party. Who have gained enough pain to not be wasting time with wrong partners. The number of exes they had is not even a guarantee to say they have learned or have loved the right way because they're just like anyone whose unsure of the next things to come. So when I get to meet my Jae Yeol, I'll make sure to fall in love! But if he's not yet the one then it's okay, that's (still) love! 


In love,
Miss Piggy ❤️.❤️

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

For the UNprepared Backpacker,

I’ll tell you something you probably know but almost missed to remember on and/or before your planned trip.

These are the things I learned from travelling overseas:

1. Get a good value for your pocket money. You don’t need to know the fundamentals of the foreign currency you want to exchange your money into but the tip is to have a benchmark among the rates of money exchange stalls and banks in your area before going straight to the airport. Because it's a big NO to have your money changed in airports since they make business out of tourists who probably don’t know THIS!

First thing’s first, know the present exchange rate of your money to USD via google or an app on your phone then do the same with USD to the ccy of the country you’ll be visiting, let’s say KRW. Once you have it keep your notes on your phone and make the ideal rates. See below.

As of 09/12/14:
43.95 PHP = 1USD = 1038.25KRW
So if you’re exchanging your base ccy (PHP) to USD, you’re Buying USD so you should get the LOWEST price possible. And if you’re selling your USD back to peso, you should get the HIGHEST price  possible.

Tip: In Korea, you're entitled a tax refund for every minimum single receipts of 50,000 krw!!! You can have your receipts scanned along with your foreign passport in their auto banks and airports so you can save the guilt of shopping since you'll get your 3,500 won back! Isn't amazing?!?!! 

2. Print out discount coupons. Yes, you read it right! In some countries like Korea and Singapore they give discounts to foreign tourists about 10% to 50% discounts on entrance fees to tourist destinations down to cosmetic products! So print them and make multiple copies and give it out to your unprepared trip buddies.

3. DISABLE. Soon as you were advised by the Flight Attendant to turn off phones and gadgets, do so to keep you from possible charges. Turn off the data roaming of your phone when web browsing and using email, MMS, and other data services. Better yet put your phone in Airplane Mode when you're not wifi connected so it is just as good as a camera, ipod and a calculator in one. 

4. Round Off. When going for a shop best way is to have your mental math do the work for you than relying through your phone’s calculator or bugging your travel buddy for the conversion.

So you’re buying a Missha BB cream which cost 16,800KRW…

To arrive with the value in peso you have two options:

Option1: Ignore the insignificant zeros then round off to whole number then multiply with the rate of your usd in PHP thus we get the cost:
17Krw*44Php = 748Php (estimated cost)
16.8Krw * 43.95Php = 739.36PHP (actual cost)

Option2: Divide amount to the rate of KRW to PHP:
(1038.25krw/usd) / (43.95php/usd)= 23.62 or 24Php/Krw
So if you're way good in division do this:
16,800krw / 24php/krw = 700PHP 

Note: As an employee who works in a Bank doing Forex settlements, Option2 is indeed the right way to convert but since I'm promoting mental math and convenience here, I recommend the use of Option1. But you can always borrow the calculator on the desk of the cashier (if there's any) whenever you're buying in a foreign country.

5. Play your part. I always been the traveler who doesn't care if I get lost during a trip to a foreign city or country but since we have travel buddies who doesn't want even can't imagined that happening so they make sure everything's well taken care of. There you'll find yourself leaning on to them for directions but since that could be too much to take that's when you make yourself useful, be the interactive buddy who ask around among locals when things get tough like you get lost finding the way to exit the subway station or probably you all are doubting the instructions you found in the internet. That's one smooth operation to make your presence felt during a trip. So gear up because you'll need more body language than your English.



6. Bargain. This should always be a practice when travelling in a foreign country because they will definitely make money out of you base from your foreign looks. So make yourself accustomed to their language as if you know or you just pronounced them correctly because you'll definitely get their reaction right away and give you a smile or a big laugh because of your awkward tricks to ask for a discount! 

I tell you this should be studied just like their formal greetings because remember it's the thought that counts. Your efforts will pay off once you memorize these phrases to live by during your stay: 

in Hangul/Korean: 

How much is it? – ol-ma-ye-yo?

Give me a discount – Kka-kka-ju-se-yo~

In Thai: 

Can you please give me discount? - Lot hai dai mai kha?

7. Bring an extension wire ALWAYS. Whenever we travel we always pay for the use of adapter since most of the times the socket and plugs are different from what we use. So be it three holes or four or round or square you have to prepare for the worst. Because you don't like your smart phone dying right?

8. No to excess bags. Weigh your baggage before checking in so you can manage where to stuff the excess. Better if you have your eco bags with you in case your back pack is already full.

9. On Time for Departure. This will be the saddest part of the itinerary, last day, bidding goodbye so don't make it tough anymore by rushing to the airport or worst be left by your promo fare plane ticket. Allot time when you travel back to the airport, when checking in your luggage, having your passport stamped by Immigration officer and photo ops inside the airport.

10. Again, DON'T EXCHANGE YOUR EXCESS MONEY IN THE AIRPORT!!!


In love,
Miss Piggy ❤️