I progress in writing in pajama-jama days. Wearing my pajama all day is one of the best things of doing actually nothing. I love my lazy daysss...Zzzz... I grew up just like this like I can even wear them out with nothing to hide at all. And that "tucked-in" is my epic signature! bwahahaha!!! But I wonder...
What will it take to get me out of my jammies? ehem...
I know that my previous posts are misleading you to living the comfortable feel of this blog. I may be sad, lonely and sort of depress these past few days but I wish you won't get influenced. It’s crazy how someone who is usually surrounded with people, can feel so alone. Most days are unsatisfying and dull. I just wanted to tell you all to keep your chins up and just get through this. I've been trying to be contented lately with how my life is. Finding the work or field that I can be passionate about is indeed a process that needs time and prayers.
But, like any of you I have flaws and unpretty issues to get over with. Well anyway I'm pretty cool with stuff like that. It's a natural phenomena in one's life and a lesson I've learned from this is that you just have to give yourself the chance to ask for help and let someone or some help you. So no worries I'll be fine in no time.
Who knows I'll be a Saxophonist or a well renowned Surgeon? Hihihihi Don't mind my randomness but lesson here is that we can be anyone we want to be in this life but there is called God that permits them from happening. We can go blind or suffer serious illness if that's what it takes for someone like me and you to realize and appreciate something's worth it before it's too late. We can be pushed to edge but it will always be for the better. Possibilities coincide with how we manage our thoughts and how we put it in action. Though I wish I can solve my delimma in 1-2-3 but thanks for it because if not for this mishap then no post like today will be written and read.
Hence, go find something that makes you sparkle and shine your brightest to let that purpose out. Go spread your options... I sarangh you all~
First thing's first, one of my hates' aside from acting pa'cute is to post negative or hateful status on facebook and the likes. I hate it when my emotions are eating me alive. Like my cringing fingers now forming into round ready for a fist fight because of my disgust whenever i do remember myself trying hard or showing hatred like now. But to be honest, I'm in my biggest battle now. It's already been a month since I felt this alien feeling of boredom and tiresome from work and my vague future. Pathetic it may seem but I don't like the person who I am now. It feels like i'm a no fun at all person that is so anxious over the future. I just like to move on so I'm really trying to get away from this chapter as fast as I can and lead again a good life where I can finally be able to treat my parents for a vacation whenever they visit or give quality gifts on holidays to friends and relatives. To be able to share my labor to our church. To be proud of my job and be satisfied with. That's a life I all wanted but my psychological state is not cooperative at the moment and doesn't seem to play its role in this toughest time. Moreover, I'm missing my old self so much that I've been trying ways to deal with this just by myself since its not really my thing to bother family and friends to get serious with this. And so I know I should call Him more often and listen and let his will take over. Sorry Lord if I'm like this so pushy how my destiny should be but all I wish is to cause no harm to anyone and just live like how Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom. He managed to adapt even if he's a sponge. To laugh satisfyingly even if its just a simple joke, to eat whatever I wanted without looking for the back label which tells the food's calorie. Just like how I used to be in my college days, I wanted to be the person who is acting according to her own will and conviction that may it be a bad or a good thing in the end it will always be a rare and a surprising experience that MISIL had. No regrets as long as she tried. I miss that Misil, Lord please bring her back. Amen.
My stacked food is found missing from its bag. I wish I'm not thinking too so I can just randomly accuse anyone and ask to exchange it with a new one. I don't want to make this a big of a deal but i need help to get this out of my thinking brain so I got to rationalize where I may have had faults in this mishap.
In science it can be explained this way~ the nervous system is made up of two main parts: the brain and the spinal cord which its the "information highway" where msgs flow back and forth. And so from the snack calmly in its bag serves as the stimulus to the crime scene. Now, an impulse is heading through the nerve into the spinal cord, and eventually all the way to the brain. And its done. Someone got hungry or salivating on that moment and its no where to be found now.
As for math, missing ones' are always known as X and there's only one definite answer to all problem solving questions. But for now let it be T for Thief. So T was the sole person in the room the whole night, yesterday no one's around except T. No T1 or T2 in the given. Im not anymore surprised with the Solution: The 100g of snack can only satisfy one person. So using ratio and proportion it's just 1:1. Answer: Therefore, its evident that there's only one person who get herself into trouble. On the other hand, psychology gives number of tendencies but which taught me to trust instincts but you got to deal with wide range of understanding to different folks in different walks of life. Phew! The hardest is to deal with those. So in a matter of proving facts this happens with no suspicions or whatsoever I get to chat with this mate and become friends even before she did this to me, like how roommates should be we were close like looking roommates. And there I realized my fault for this four time barging in in my properties is that I've come to be a friend to her but she doesn't see me as such most probably. My thoughts were like is she toying me? Is she some one of those loose headed near where we stay? Aughhh! This is sickening!
And how about we try what Law and its justice have to say about this. I don't have witness or anything but I saw my bag with lacking one snack after I was out for the whole day yesterday. I know i didn't ate any of it since it's rare enough for me to eat it when I know it will just be a disturbance in my series watching. Plus its BBQ flavor. Im always into cheese and not bbq so I'll surely remember its aroma upon opening. And the sad part is this isn't the first time she does this crime to me making me a total victim here! Owww i cant talk to this person anymore. She's sick. Low life!
That I never planned of saying but it could've came out if I happen to confront her and I don't wish to make her feel betrayed myself because its like acting like her. But close mouth for me till when?!???? You know that this isn't just a clover right?!? So Lord you're all I have here. Studies don't matter much in this case. Please let her learn the lesson and lead me to change and to leave this in the past.
When talks were about how I've been doing or the things I'm busy with I started to act as if I'm not hearing at all. I don't bother to care. I get easily hurt so I tend to avoid those kind of things. 😑 Not that I'm doing bad deeds so pleaseeeee refrain from misunderstanding. I just know that it's safe for me to say that my hobbies and interests are a bit weird... (Oops! That surprised me either!)
For important pointers, I tried to learn from them when my colleagues and family tell me I should. But at most times I don't simply because I want my initiative to take its course and not because they said so. When I get calls from my parents about my future plans I occasionally answer, “I’ll check up on it”, it’s not that I’m hiding, but I really don’t know. Other than doing what's expected, I tend not to focus on much else, even what they'll be thinking afterwards. I just focus on doing something I can be satisfied and proud of. Then that's maybe the reason why I've been going to church. So I'll sure listen. Hehe! Will be going now Lord~ 🙋
Soon as I woke up today I was so pissed with my bad dream. Then next thing I know I tweeted the person involved... @micLtoe: @masijacoke85 Oppah, you just been reported dead in my dream. Please always take care whenever you're out for a massage ok?! #badDream Arra~ this is the baddest right to let a living person know about his death news because of a petty fan's dream! Aigoo!
My dream goes like Kwang Soo oppah was off from his work and so had his body massage somewhere near the convenience store where he was reported dead. Prior to that while he's slurping his ramen a lady was asking for his number cutely she's like spazzing over the sight of Mr. Lee Kwang Soo but our dear betrayer seemed to be asleep in everybody's eyes and sort of completely ignoring the pretty lady by his side and she's tall by the way. Everyone in the store was waiting for his reaction (its like Running Man cameras are everywhere shooting the scene) but soddenly Kwang Soo was found dead by then. Reports on tv goes... Actor and Running Man member was found dead in a convenience store due to wrong body conditioning. (Not sure if there's really such cause of death~) Then a footage of Yoo Jae Suk announcing the death of Kwang Soo in place of the family's main griever. 😣 Then it all went so serious to me now since a flash of RunningMan cast were doing their farewell and send off songs and goodbyes in memory of their maknae. 😰
Sadly speaking I wish this isn't true of course. A Running Man without the giraffe, framer, maknae, easy brother, gwangvatar and betrayer is like eating hot ramen without water to drink afterwards. I know this is really disappointing but please Kwang Soo oppah see this as a reminder to take good care of yourself no matter how tired you are. Have a home service instead than having your massage outside which exposed it from fluctuating temperature. Also get your mind right, since just like in my dream you might missed to get to know a very good looking, talk as you young lady!!! I wish for you to always be energetic and healthy to run with the cast as long as you wanted. Keep on fighting and Manse!!! Live long!
Owww.. that thought if Kwang Soo is... WAHHHHH!!! Andehhh~~~